The jagged edged knife of learning…..

Tibetan sword. Jewelry in the Yunnan Nationali...
Tibetan sword. Jewelry in the Yunnan Nationalities Museum, Kunming, Yunnan, China. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
sword
sword (Photo credit: Guitarwarlord)

The jagged edged knife of learning

cuts deeper into all the places that need cleansing.

 I sit,  not feeling defiled,

 but,  wistful  wanton, willful, and wild.

Lost and broken as an abandoned child

I want to know, be, and see.

I cannot get past “me”. 

The “me” that is.

The “me” that I am becoming.

All  of “me” talking at once.

I need more silence…

More time alone

in cleansing and surrendering. 

The jagged knife cuts further still.

I am now surrendered to thy will.

I sob.

 Out comes all the loneliness.

I cry tears of joy

from the months

 years of disconnect.

I stand alone on  the forest floor.

Surrendered broken, wanting

 more.

Naked, dancing in the rain.

I lift my aging arms in praise.

I fall and rise again.

This is how I spend my days….

With the jagged knife of learning.

 The restlessness in Soul is burning. 

Into the inner worlds I am turning.

The higher view takes command.

The learning gives me a new place to stand.

The jagged edged knife of learning

cuts deeper into all the places that need cleansing.

I stay in the forest for many days.

Then the sunlight  of the spirit starts to play.

My wounds are healing.

My heart is reeling.

It will be a good Journey home. 

Trees are my sanctuary * Photo credite Sonny Alfredo Galea * Jasper National Park

Early morning walk with love…….

I have shaken out bed clothes, I have bathed, cleansed, and surrendered.

I walk into the meadow the leaves so full of frost.

I want to step into a younger body and roll down in the leaves. 

I want to capture the beauty of the early morning walk with love.

The silent teacher in the Forest – Photo credit – Mary Helen Ferris – Jasper National Park – Canada – Sept 2008

Its the long weekend……what the hell…….I have stories left to tell

Peyto Lake in Banff National Park, Alberta, Canada
Peyto Lake in Banff National Park, Alberta, Canada (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Ringrose Peak soars above a pond near Lake O'H...
Ringrose Peak soars above a pond near Lake O’Hara, British Columbia, Canada (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
I spent a few days in Jasper National Park in ...
I spent a few days in Jasper National Park in Alberta, Canada as part of my Summer 2009 “This Sure Beats Working” tour. I drove into Jasper from Mt. Robson – incredible scenery despite air thick with smoke from forest fires in British Columbia. Jasper is incredibly gorgeous – almost as good as Alaska – if you have a chance, check it out! (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Snowbirds on Labour Day Weekend
Snowbirds on Labour Day Weekend (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It is the long weekend….

what the hell…

I have stories left to tell.

In sharing the news of the long weekend at the food bank….

the homeless out of work man said

“I wish I was working and had a home so the long weekend….would mean something.”

 

I shared my smile and said

“Don’t worry, dear heart, after 65 it is always a long weekend.”

 

As I young woman I hated the long weekend….

because I was always working

 did not have family to share the time with.

As an old crone, I love the long weekend, as I still have stories yet to tell.

Love is the mortar

    Jasper National Park   Canada   Evening Falls   photo –  Sonny Alfredo Galea

Let the little love

of the day

be the mortar

 to hold you together.

The bricks of life

can knock you down,

put you in rough times

or stormy weather.

That mortar of love

will have you stand tall

and an edifice build

Put love in all you do

through  surrender

to the Creator’s will.

What you build

with the choices

You have made

Will turn your attitude

Into  joy for the journey.

The abundance of love

As you practice each day

Will give you

calmness over flowing.

Pretty soon

you will be sharing

it with others.

Without you

ever really knowing

The results of the giving.

Make this a great

way of living

With gratitude

each step of the day.

The choices you

make are all up to you

This is just a suggestion I bring.

Make your heart of love

the springboard 

Of every action that you take.

Make service for others 

Your mandate

Your mantra

The purpose of your strife….

Then truly, dear hearts,

you will be living

the graceful life. 

Let the Sunlight of the Spirit

shine on all you do.

Let the true surrender

to love see you through.

Notes from the Edge….

Living on the Edge - Mountain Goats and Sheep photo credit Sonny Alfredo Galea Sept 2008 Jasper National Park, Canada

There is room enough for learning, loving and living

While residing on the edge….

I do not take up

so much space just my bodies place.

A wedge or three  for slices of my happiness,

my responsibilities,

my dreams and aspirations. 

My wee corner on the edge

is not known to many to others

Just the spiritual travelers,

the Masters,

my Soul sistas

and Soul brothers.

They watch me grow and groan.

They hear me laugh and moan.

I would rather have the struggles

that I face out here on the edge

Than to conform to someone else’s bidding

trying to fit me in their wedge.

I am not denying it was great to be in love.

I just cannot give up my faith.

I will not give up my mission.

Just to have someone hold my hand, 

While I adhere to their conditions.

So, dear hearts,

if  you think that I am struggling

Take a moment to see my smile.

I am building

a winter cabin here on the edge.

This lesson might take a while.

Beloved friends, I wish you well.

Former husbands, lovers and beaus

You have my love and a piece of my heart

But I really had to go.

Out here on the edge …

I follow my quest

To learn, laugh and live….

Most of all to forgive.

While I am here

I am learning, my dear.

I will not settle for second best. 

I love you and all ways

and always will.

 Without my time out here on the edge

I will not be learning

about forgiving

Compassion, understanding,

obedience to my calling.

It would be stifling

pretending to live life with you.

So,  on the edge, is where I am living. 

It is the place where I am fully alive

I learn about the Master’s love

Not merely how to survive.

So dear heart,

I hope this note helps you to understand

I would rather walk alone with my quest not sated..

Than to be with someone who

can not give

me my freedoms.

Someone with whom

I am not appreciated. 

I may die alone out

here on the craggy edge shelf.

But better that, than to be with someone 

That I cannot be myself.

Or where my mission and golden contract were always circumspect.

Where your approval I could never collect.                 

I would rather be alone

with my calling and duty

Than be turned into a useless beauty.

So dear heart, I hope now you know

My friends, my mission and calling

Are more important to me

Than the orders you are bawling.

On the edge is where I am living. 

It is the place where I am fully alive

I learn about the Master’s love

Not merely how to survive.

Blessings to you dear hearts,

beloveds on the wind

Until we are together

on the wings of the Masters love…

I will  be out here living on the edge

where living is always not kind

But there is so much more to do

till I take my home above.

Fevered Journey

img_0907

Photo credit – Sonny Galea- Wild Wilderness Photography    Jasper National Park Canada Sept 2008

The fever distorts

the little reality that I know.

I live in the moment 

“beyond the beyond”

I see beauty in Its perfect array.

I cling to the moment.

I live in the beauty

of the sublime.

I will be sad.

when the fever subsides.

For back to reality,

 I must abide. 

But for the moment

It is the beloved

imagination I ride.

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 Photo by MaryHelen Ferris -Jasper National Park Canada – Sept 2008